The Story of Rupert
(or Don't leave your Umbrella alone with Bored Tourists)
Once upon a time there lived an umbrella name Rupert. Not any ordinary umbrella, Rupert was green and had a yellow bird's head and a green beak. Some of Rupert's friends thought he was supposed to be a puffin. But Rupert knew better. He was one-of-a-kind, and didn't resemble any bird known in the world. One day, Rupert was sitting in his rack (as he did every day), and a woman picked him up. Rupert thought, "Well, who is this pretty woman, and will she buy me?" He later found out that her name was Lisa, and she did buy Rupert that day. "Your yellow head would be perfect to help guide tourists through Europe," Lisa told Rupert.
Rupert wistfully stares out the window wondering
what he's gotten himself into.
|Where did Rupert go?|
|Maybe Rupert will come back after I take a nap.|
|Rupert, is that you?|
|Rupert, I will keep you safe. You don't have to hide anymore.|
|Gary, do you want to be my new owner? Gary? Hello?|
A few days later, Rupert found himself on a big bus surrounded by tourists. Some of these people looked crabby after being in the bus so many hours today, and they frightened Rupert. Lisa was not there to comfort Rupert so he decided to hide. Rupert hid himself on a hook beside Lisa's seat. Rupert thought it was good to hide here because he was green and the curtains next to the hook were green too. When Lisa returned to her seat, she searched for Rupert but could not find him. "Who took Rupert?" she said. She seemed angry because she thought some of the tourists took him, but he was only hiding. Now Rupert was embarrassed and could not go back to Lisa. Lisa went to sleep but Rupert still hid. "Now what do I do?" Rupert thought.
Lisa woke up later, and started talking to the other tourists. She still seemed to think that they had taken Rupert from her. She could not be more wrong! Finally, Lisa saw Rupert out of the corner of her eye. "There you are Rupert," she said. She did not seem angry anymore so Rupert let Lisa take him back. Rupert decided never to hide from Lisa again.
Later, when everyone was asleep, Rupert went exploring on the bus, and found a tourist named Gary. Rupert perched in the drink holder in front of Gary and wondered what it would be like to have a new owner. But then Gary woke up and Rupert wanted to go back to Lisa.
--- THE END ---
[Editor's note: This is only an interpretation of the events (based upon eyewitness testimony) that actually took place that day.]
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Last updated 11/12/2005 . Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.